The g'mara on today's daf presents several laws that are all derived from the command to keep far from a false matter. They include:

• A disciple sitting before his master (who is judging a case) who sees that the poor man is right and the wealthy man is wrong must speak up.

• A man who has a claim of 100 zuzim against his neighbor may not sue for 200 zuzim with the expectation of being bargained down.

• A judge should not hear the words of one litigant before the other arrives.

• If two come to court, one dressed in rags and the other in fine garments, they should say to the rich one: either dress like him or dress him like you.

(31a)

This week's parsha begins with Moshe telling the people how he pleaded to God to be allowed into the land but was denied. This was because of the incident in Parshat Chukat where the people were without water, God told Moshe to speak to the rock, and instead he yelled at the people and then hit the rock in anger (and water came out). Many reasons have been brought for what specifically he did wrong there, including denying God the miracle and becoming unhinged. Another possibility is that he chastised the people inappropriately, calling them rebels.

And now, in Vaetchanan, it seems pretty clear that Moshe blames the people for his not being allowed to enter the land. Not only does he blame them but he tells them he blames them -- on account of you, he says, God will not listen to my pleas. If Moshe ever had a chance to learn from this mistake, make teshuva, and reverse the decree, he blew it here.

There is a fine line between issuing blame and holding people accountable. When people do things that cause harm we should expect them to undo the damage. That's not blame; that's holding people to their obligations. When a coworker missed an important deadline last week that affected my ability to get my own work done on time, I think it was reasonable for me to press him to clean up some of the resulting mess. When I was involved in an accident years ago that was my fault, it was completely reasonable for the other driver to expect compensation. That's accountability, and it's an important principle. There's nothing wrong with this.

Blame is different. I can hold my coworker to what he was supposed to do, but I shouldn't send out email to the whole company dressing him down no matter how tempted I am and how justified I feel. The other driver can hold me accountable for damage but -- if there's no evidence I did it maliciously or recklessly -- shouldn't start a whispering campaign among my neighbors about what a bad person I am. Accountability is about the act; blame is about the person. We hold people to actions but we don't attack them personally.

Moshe fell into an easy trap; when we're angry we are often more focused on blame than accountability. Moshe blamed the people twice for God's judgement against him. He was angry and he let it show. God couldn't let that stand.

But I noticed something interesting in the text. When Moshe repeats God's decrees about crossing the Jordan it repeatedly says "ha-yarden ha-zeh" -- this Jordan. There's only one Jordan; what's that about?

I think it's a nechemta, a comfort, to Moshe. He can't cross the Jordan into the land now but this is not the only barrier he has faced or will face -- it's not his only Jordan, metaphorically speaking. He has been barred from this crossing, this Jordan, but God has not banished him completely. Even though he lashed out at the people and blamed them, which had consequences, he can return to God. That God takes his life personally, with a kiss, privately, instead of striking him down in front of the people, is I think a sign that Moshe and God are still on good terms even after all this.

This past week was Tisha b'Av, which marks the destruction of the temple. Tradition holds that both temples were destroyed on account of our people's sins. But on the heels of that, this week we begin seven weeks of comforting haftarot leading up to the high holy days. We have been punished, but we can also be comforted. As a people we didn't cross that Jordan, but we have other chances. As individuals we have surely been barred from some Jordans, but others are still available to us. The haftarot of consolation tell us that even though we've blown it, God will take us back and wants us to return.

As we make our journey through the coming weeks, may we be comforted with the knowledge that we have more chances, more Jordans, and return to God in love.

Friday night I led services with our cantorial soloist. Both she and I were pleased with how it went, and I got several compliments afterward. I hope I will have more-frequent opportunities to do this.

One oddity, though -- somehow we picked up about ten minutes! I asked afterward and the consensus of people I trust to tell it to me straight is that no, I was not rushing. We do know that my rabbi is more prone than I am to fill in extra explanatory bits and the like; this is not a criticism of him by any means (it's not excessive or anything), but more a comment on my comparative lack of skill and tendency in this area. I just don't ad-lib as well, and he's done this about a bazillion times more than I have so he's had more practice.

It is possible that some of the time came from musical choices. Not clear. And we did start on time, because I'm like that. This doesn't always happen.

Saturday morning I led both torah study and the service. (The lay torah reader had a sore throat, so while she would have led part of the service normally, she asked me to do it.) The second rabbi was there for this and he seemed pleased with the job I did. Another member of the minyan plays guitar and led some of the singing; I'm happy to see her be more involved. The torah reader asked the rabbi to read haftarah (I think on account of her voice). I hadn't heard him read before; I really enjoyed listening to him. He read more expressively than I'm used to.

After I prepared for discussion of the post-flood rainbow, we didn't actually get there. This is the nature of Jews studying torah sometimes. :-) (We spent the entire half hour on the three or four verses immediately preceeding that part.)

Still not king a rabbi, but I get to do stuff anyway. :-)

My rabbi will be away for three Shabbatot this summer, with the first being this week. The (until-recently) associate rabbi has moved back to Israel, and the third rabbi is not looking for a large role on the bimah (though he will get some now). And the cantorial soloist has enjoyed co-leading with me in the past. So the two rabbis and the soloist all agreed that I could lead tomorrow night's service, and maybe others. I'll also be leading torah study and the morning service on Saturday; I wanted to spread that around by having someone else lead study, but it didn't work out. Our assignment is the rainbow in the Noach story; need to read up on midrash and commentary.

The third second rabbi will be present Shabbat morning, so with luck I'll get some constructive feedback, particularly on the torah study. He might come Friday night, or he might stay home with his family.

Meanwhile, for the other two times my rabbi is away there will be b'nei mitzvah. While the other rabbi is of course capable of reading torah, he doesn't feel the need to keep it to himself. So he asked me and another of the regular torah readers to read for those services. The bar mitzvah will read some, of course, but I'll be leaarning about 30 verses. This should be interesting; it may be the first tiny step toward bringing the regular morning congregation and the bar-mitzvah service together a bit.

I also just received my high-holy-day torah-reading assignment. This year they gave me Yom Kippur mincha (the afternoon service). Should be interesting to see how well I can chant that far into the fast.

I'm feeling pretty good about opportunities to lead currently. I hope we can keep some momentum going come fall/winter; I'd like to be leading services more than I am, and it sounds like there is interest from people other than me in my doing so. Nice.